We flew AirTran down to Baltimore on Friday night, and AirTran provides XM Satellite Radio. “Great!” we thought. “We’ll be able to listen to tonight’s Red Sox game! Uncle Joe will keep us company on the flight!
No such luck. The MLB Play-By-Play channel was not working. There was no audio, only score updates on a tiny screen. I thought the XM wasn’t working at all until I tried a couple of music channels and found that, no, it’s just the baseball. (And basketball too – I couldn’t even get the Celtics.)
Sitting in front of us was a group of about nine frat boys also heading down to see the Sox on Saturday, also clearly annoyed about the radio situation. But soon, I found that I had one up on them: while MLB Play-By-Play was not working, you could get the game loud and clear … on MLB En Español. Needless to say, this gave me quite a nerdy power trip on top of my thrill at being able to hear the game after all.
Now, those of you who read The Joy of Sox know that one of the delights of baseball fandom is the ridiculous nicknames you give the players on your team. And little by little, as I listened to the Spanish-language broadcast, I realized that the announcers there give their own little pet names to Sox players:
Best of all, though: on the opposing team was former Red Sox pledgemaster, media personality, and mediocre first baseman Kevin Millar, or as he’s apparently known to Spanish-speaking fans: “El Carismático.”
Millar will come, Red. He’ll come to Fenway for reasons he can’t even fathom. He’ll turn up Yawkey, not knowing for sure why he’s doing it. He’ll arrive in the bleachers as drunk as Denton, longing for the Pabst. “Of course, we won’t mind if you sit down in the bleachers,” you’ll say. “It’s only two hundred dollars per person (fucking scalpers).” He’ll pass over the money without even thinking about it; for it is money he has and Guinness he lacks.
And he’ll walk out to the bleachers, and sit in shirt-sleeves on a perfect afternoon. He’ll find they have reserved seats somewhere near the Red Seat, where he sat when he was drunk with a chicken bucket on his head in 2004. And he’ll watch the game, and it’ll be as if he’d dipped himself in dirty waters. The memories of The Steal will be so thick, he’ll have to brush them away from his face.
Millar will come, Red.
The one constant through all the years, Red, has been the Red Sox. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It’s been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But Fenway has marked the time. This field, this game, is a part of our past, Red. It reminds us of all that once was good, and it could be again. Ohhhhhhhh, Millar will come, Red. Millar will most definitely come. And probably in a time machine.
(via ailiealien)
Imagine the secondary-education version of this world. That’s where I work.
Dude … I was there.
Soon to come, more notes on Saturday’s game.
I know I’ll be tuning in tonight.
The League of Public Domain Properties
The fact that Hercules grunts in greek when he’s smashing the gate alone is enough to make this comic worth looking at.
That, and the censored word in the last panel (which I originally thought was “mercy”).
Via Slashfilm.com